Peer Pressure and Living up to what we think others think of us. How we can get affected?

Posted by Overthinking Aquarian on February 16, 2021 in living up to others expectations, negative emotions, peer pressure, societal pressure,

                                 

"The more we define ourselves in relation to the people around us, the more lost we are" - Jay Shetty, Think like a Monk

This quote made me think about how Peer Pressure affects us so much in everyday lives. 

Career, Marriage, Money(All materialistic things), Vacations, Social Lives, Kids and so on....peer pressure can indirectly and unconsciously influence our decision making in many aspects of our life. 

We get caught up in this web of living up to other people's perception of us, other people's expectations from us and how WE expect other people to see us. 

I've been through this phase of catching up with trends, trying to do things just out of peer pressure and being disappointed if I am not able to. My husband pointed this out a couple of times and asked me if I was doing it just out of peer pressure. I would justify myself saying, "Yeah may be, but I WANT to do it". But, that is not a good enough reason, right? 

In my husband's words "You be you, you do you".

Young kids can feel peer pressure too. Most of the time, it is the parents under the peer pressure to have the kids meet certain expectations, and sometimes the kids themselves face it. It could be in the form of toys, gadgets, clothes etc. In adolescents, it can lead to bad decision making and life choices.

I remember the times when I was a kid and felt compelled to have fancy back packs or pencil cases, wanting to have grand birthday parties.... only because other kids were doing the same. Sounds familiar? My son is still a few years away from feeling peer pressure yet, but I know that phase will come. 

Peer pressure may not necessarily be a bad thing if you know how to handle it. But otherwise, peer pressure can lead to negativity, disappointment, bad relationships and other distractions from our real value and purpose in life. 

Living as per society's expectations or norms should not be the rule-of-thumb. They should be goals which we should strive to attain only after careful thought and consideration that we actually want/need it.